Foodland Security

I am pretty good about staying in my budget and not spending money, but not when it comes to grocery shopping. I have no desire to buy shoes or clothes or make-up or get my hair or nails done (my kids say that my neighbor looks prettier mowing her lawn than I did on my wedding day -- and it's true), but I have no problem at all spending tons of money on food.

I've tried all the tricks. I'm no longer allowed in those wholesale discount warehouses. I go in for a gallon of milk (or two gallons, you can't buy just one) and I come out with $200 worth of stuff! I try shopping only around the perimeter of the store (only fresh products, no mixes or frozen dinners), and I still buy too much. I've tried using only cash. I've tried not going to the store while I'm hungry. I always fail.

So what has worked? My daughter, Frances. She is one of those by the rules, color in the lines, don't go against the grain type of people. Most people can't bring their kids grocery shopping because they fill the cart up with candy and cookies. Not Frances.

She makes sure that I use only the small grocery carts (so I can't fit so much food in it). She makes sure that I don't buy any chips or unnecessary food. I tell her my budget and she adds it up as we go and even makes sure we account for tax (yes, our state charges sales tax on food).

Even when we have a few dollars left over and I ask her if she'd like a treat like a carton of ice-cream, she says, "No, save the money."

So far, it's been working. Frances, head of our very own Foodland Security.

We are Not Amused

OK, so Nigel just read my blog and told me that the correct title of the book is "Amusing Ourselves to Death." Sorry.

He's amazing. He remembers everything and has the incredible ability to never spend money. I mean, he can have the same $20 bill in his pocket for months on end and it never occurs to him to spend it.

Of course, he's also done the same thing with paychecks. Once I was putting away his laundry (OK, who am I kidding -- me, putting away laundry? I was probably rifling through his drawers looking for money he never spent) and found paychecks he never cashed. This wouldn't be a big deal, but the company no longer existed!

It may be because he's above this whole money thing, or just because he's an artist, or maybe that his memory isn't as great as I said it was.

Entertaining Ourselves to Death

So my husband, Nigel, once had a book titled, "Entertaining Ourselves to Death." I never read it, but the title has stayed with me. I would like to think of myself as being above the things of this commercial world, but I'm always getting sucked into it.

I hate the idea of buying things I don't need with money that I don't have, just to spend the rest of my life dusting it, moving it, and having to take care of it. I'm always thinking that this new purchase will make my life complete. Well, surprise, surprise, it doesn't.

Sometimes I am good. Often times when handed a coupon for some "must have" product, I just look the much too peppy salesperson in the eye and say, "Want to see me save even more money?" And I promptly crumple it up and throw it away and walk out of the store.

Anyway, so my daughter, Alice-Grace, and I are totally bored. In America, what do you do when you're bored? You either spend money or eat. Mostly, you end of going to the mall and doing both. What's the most common problem with Americans? They're too fat and in debt. So, I had to come up with something to do that would entertain us, not cost anything, actually do some good for someone else, and maybe even get some food out of it. Then it came to me --

DONATE BLOOD. I called the local American Red Cross chapter (they're always calling me anyway because I have a very common blood type and I'm a "bleeder") and set up an appointment. I grabbed Alice-Grace, headed out, and we made a day of it.

I got to sit and relax and read a magazine, they had a children's play area for Alice-Grace, I did something good for someone else, AND we got free cookies and juice afterwards. What could be better than that? Plus I got a very pretty pink bandage around my arm.

We skipped happily out of the building with our boredom gone and our tummies full. Plus, I had the satisfaction of knowing that for once, I didn't give in to my urge to spend money.